Here i'm. Once again. Back here where i once begins. I need a change. Change will do you good, no?

So here i'm once again.

testing hmmmmmm

[One Final Entry]

So sorry people, I haven't been updating here for quite a while. I realised that this blog is still being visited. Well, I've been busy updating in another site, that's why..eheh! So guess this is my final entry here, guys! And welcome to my new home here.

But pardon me, as the new site is still under minor tweaking here and there. Nevertheless, it's running fine. So I shall see you there then?

Ciao!

Roger and out for the final entry here!


Have moved to kiezamy.diaryland.com

[Back-post edition 11 - This is touchlink..]

14th Jul 2003

1308 hrs


*long sigh*, just finish catching up with the wajib blogs..eheh! Why is this so? Coz my internet connection at home decided to ditch me, isk! So for the time being (hope it won't be that long..erkss,till the bill is paid up..) I got to do with posting and reading and even surfing during the office hours. Bah..!!

Anyway, my weekend has been a worried one (something to do with the title I put up today) but all is over and done with. What a relief that the things that crossed my mind during that period didn't happen. So my Friday and Saturday were spent worrying. Sunday was nothing much, doing the washing and stuff.

Right now, I'm putting up a "disappearance" act. eheh! Sorry Nen, I've been so quiet lately...ermm, got things and problems to sort out. I'll be "back". Hope it's really soon. My life is kinda of messy right now, but I'm sorting it out bit by bit. Have already settled quite a major problem over the weekend. So it'll be quite a less thorny ride now.

I got things on my mind but not a word to put to it.

Got things to talk about but can't to seem to spit it now. Be back later eh?

Have a good Monday, not a bluey one..

People said that I'm strong, I've never let a problem get to me. I'm all smiley all the time..but is that what I really am?

Current Read: Sehangat Asmara - Aisya Sofea

[Back-post edition 10 - Anything & Everything]

10th Jul 2003

1321 hrs


hmm..got so much to write about. First thing, I was again late for the office! Yeah, what do you expect when I only get to catch some forty winks at nearly 5 in the morning? Reason? Here goes. I had just posted my entry here last night and was already in bed. Reading the book and trying to return his call (he misscalled me while I was jotting down the last entry) at the same time. When I heard a voice. Thinking it's my grandma snoring, I looked down on her (mine is a double bunk bed). But she was fast asleep. I heard the voice again. And this time, I just leaped off my bed. It's my grandpa. He's bending over, with his head down. Oh God! "Tok, kenapa ni?" I ran over to him, helping him out. My mom and grandma hearing the commotion also woked up. "Tok nak apa?" "Nak air." And that marks the beginning of a sleepless night. After that little commotion, we decided to retreat to our bedroom after seeing that he had fallen asleep. And me, back to trying to call him (having a bad reception on his side). Awhile later, after finishing our short conversation, I heard my grandma calling out to me. Ran over to the kitchen. Grandpa was on the toilet floor. He fell down again and my grandma is trying to help him out. I rushed over, helped him up and walked him slowly to his bedroom. Told me, he was hungry and wanted some biscuits. Made him some and he feel asleep again soon after. Thinking everything is fine now, we again try to get some sleep. But at this time, I was already worried. So I decide to read the book for awhile when suddenly I heard a very loud noise coming from my grandpa's bedroom. Again, I leaped from my bed. Grandma and Mom rushed out too. He was lying against the wardrobe, trying to get up. "Tok cari apa, sampai kat sini?" "Cari air." "Kan air ada kat atas meja tu." We were now very worried about the sudden change is his behaviour. So me, my grandma and mom decide to stay up. We were sitting down, talking about his condition when again I heard some noise. Rushed over to his room. Saw him sitting with his torchlight, shining it on the table beside his table. "Tok cari apa?" "Biskut, tadi kan letak sini." "Eh mana ada. Tadi kan Tok makan kat luar." "Tadi letak sini. Macamana korang cakap ni??!" He appeared agitated at this point. "Tok nak biskut ke?" "A'ahlah, nak makan. Iskk!" He was grumbling to himself. I rushed out, get him some biscuits and water. Soon after, he felt asleep again. By this time, it's already nearly 4 am. We were all getting more worried when he woke up from sleep suddenly and started to mumble to himself. And throughout the night, he kept waking up to ease himself. By around 5, he's already fast asleep. Told my grandma, I need to catch some sleep. Felt asleep with so much worries for him.




Moving on, the Iranian twins had been flown home early this morning after a prayer session involving the Singapore's Mufti Syed Isa Semait and Singapore's Minister-in-Charge of Muslim Affairs Yaacob Ibrahim, which were held at the Ba'alwie Mosque yesterday. Over a 100 members of the Iranian community also paid their last respect to the twins. Hope their souls rest in peace with their last wish fulfilled. To be separated. Semoga roh mereka di tempatkan bersama orang-orang yang solih, insyallah.




On another issue: Chewing gum is back! Yeah, it's finally back here after 11 years (wow..that's a very long time eh? And how old was I at that time..erkss! 15 years old only and being deny the luxury of chewing on a chewing gum..eheh! Well, I did got my share of it. A lot of it..) Rejoice chewing-gummers!! As for me, chewing gum doesn't really appeal to me anymore. But if I got the chance (with a little smuggling across the Causeway) or while I was across the Causeway, I helped myself to it. :)




So long entry isn't? That's about it then.

Hungry now.

[Back-post edition 9 - Routine]

9th Jul 2003

2311 hrs


Got to wake up early 'morrow..wake up early, wake up early..erkss! Just heard the clock tick, 11pm! So just a short update, ok.

I was late this morning. Really late! Just couldn't drag myself out of bed. And it's like I'm so broke now. Kalau tak, boleh aje naik cab. So in the end, sms my boss saying that I will be late , might reached office at around 9.30 am. Alasannya? Was not feeling well (eheh..tipu sket aa..) Reached office at 9.20 am, spent the whole morning going thru my notes to prepare for the sharing session (but in the end, the sharing session only involves a teeny bit of my part..cehh!)

Afternoon, clear up some funding payment. Followed by the sharing session which lasted for around an hour. Was back at the office nearly 5. At first, thought of staying back to finish up some work and also to make for being late this morning..but by 5.45 I was already out of the office..eheh!

Evening at home was a routine. Dinner, tv or surfing till bedtime. In between, do some reading, sms-ing or phone calls. After that, is the bed.

So now it's to the bed I have to go so as not to be late again tomorrow.

He called me just now. So glad to hear his voice. Been missing him so bad especially tonite.

erkss..esok nak pakai baju apa eh? ermm..

[Back-post edition 8 - Till Death Do Us Apart]

8th Jul 2003

2312 hrs


Dari DIA kita datang, padaNya kita kembali.. The death of the Iranian twins came as a blow to the Iranians community here and back home, also to those who had been following the updates of the operation to separate them. The news came shortly after the press conference announcing the success of the operation. But shortly after that, Ladan passed away followed by Laleh 2 hours later. Seeing their joyful faces hours before the operations griped people's heart. May their souls rest in peace.

A colleague of mine passed away too earlier this morning after being hospitalised for heart attack last week. He passed away at 3 am this morning leaving behind his wife and daughter who will be taking her 'A' Levels later this year. Even though, I did not knew him personally and never talked to him before I'm always aware of his presence due to his massive figure. He's was a very fat man, always dozing off during talks and meetings. May his soul too rest in peace.

All these gripping news today jolted me a little. How precious life is. Ajal tak kira masa. Bila-bila sahaja kita boleh di jemputNya.Tapi apa persediaan kita? Kalau di fikir-fikirkan memang banyak lagi yang kita nak capai semasa hayat kita ni. Tapi berkesempatan ke? Dan kadang-kadang dalam mencapai keinginan duniawi, akhirat kita tergadai. Akhirnya, tiada apa yang di bawa pulang saat maut menjemput kita. And yes, it scares me..alot.

Anyway, life goes on. (I just hate this liner!) Things got to be done. Work got to be completed:

1. Prepare for tomorrow NFS@Gov Training Session

2. Get copies of SYD's Pac@Gov weekly claim reimbursement

3. Complete and submit the Business Continuity Plan (BCP) by this Friday

4. Get feedback for BCP training schedule
   

ermm..anything else? Think that's about it. Anyway, remember the feeling I had yesterday evening? Well, it sort of stay, marred only by waking up a teeny late (but still reaching the office early..err, not so early but earlier then 9am when my office hours begin at 8.30 am). But the rest of the day went fine.

Yihaa! Tomorrow is midweek already..*S*

Note: Seems to have much more things to talk about but now? ermm..gone, so that is then!

[Back-post edition 7 - What A Feeling..]

7th Jul 2003

2324 hrs


So what shall it be tonite?

I'm feeling sleepy already. But it's only 11pm. Will tried to stay awake later and do some more readings of this interesting book I got back from KL.

Anyway, just a little update before I'm make my way to Dreamland. Well, currently I do have some under goings plan. Hope everything goes fine, insyallah. And I also find myself possessing some reincarnation of a long-lost spirit..haha, don't knowlah. But I have this feeling in me that want me to keep myself going on. Tapi, janganlah feeling ni kejap je kan. Esok-esok padam. So to put to practise this great feeling that I have now, I shall have to start tonite by having an early nite (erkss..now still early?)

He called a few times today too.(eh, maybe this add up to this feeling that I'm having..agaknya kot, eheh..) He's fine there. Sure hope he will be back soon.

By the way, before I forget..thanks to Nano. Sorry, cause I came down unannounced. Tetau, timbul jek. But thanks for putting me up for the night. *S*

erkss..i'm really sleepy. But before that, a little something I discovered here. Actually it's a linkage I found from a blog site but alas, I've forgotten from which blog issit:

This is mine -

Sagittarius & B-Type:

for Women

Personality: You enjoy a carefree life but that's why your indecisiveness might trouble you at times. Decisions are made so quickly that you tend to regret them afterwards. One thing you do right is choosing your friends. Concentrate on one aspect instead of many or else your focus fades too fast.

Love Tendency: Bright and vivacious; you are surround by popularity. This is why there are quite a few admirers who are just waiting for you to recognize them. You, on the other hand, enjoy fishing them out of the sea. Anything else is too easy for you. Commitment seems to be a difficult matter for you because you seek for the fun things in life more than tranquility.

Life: Your great sense of humor usually elevates you out of the crowd. This asset will get you far with people and with your pursuit of happiness. If your organization skills will improve, you will have a greater chance to make it far in terms of your career.

Match

Good Match: O-type Aries and Leos are people whom you would be able to share a happy relationship with for a lifetime. AB-type Sagittarius fit into this category as well. B-type and O-type Libras and AB-type Aquarius would also match with you if you are willing to put in some effort.

Bad Match: A-type Pisces people can somber your day because they drag you down with them. A-type Virgos are best to be avoided before matters get worse.

Alrite then, I'm off for the night!

Current Read: Cinta Pertama - Norhayati Berahim

psst..guess who I met on the way back here at the highway? I met the Msian PM (or should I say ex-PM?)! What a suprise!!

[Back-post edition 6 - Post Holiday Blues]

7th Jul 2003

1340 hrs

Written @ 1315 hrs

How am I feeling now? ermm..my feelings is on a roller-coaster. Kejap kat atas, kejap kat bawah. Feels good at one point and down in the other. argghh! What am I suffering from? Post-holiday blues. Yes, that's it. And plus, today's Monday making it all more worse...urhh..

My holiday? Great! I got back yesterday evening; 10.30 am coach from Ampang, Kuala Lumpur. ermm..think things are fine now. Hopefully. And now I'm thinking of making my way down again. hahah..teruk kan?! Baik dok saner je, senang..eheh! Well, like I already said. Intention tu memang ada. Tapi it's not easy. So kenalah plan betul-betul. Tak boleh terjah camtu je.

While I was there, went down to Ikea @ One Utama (eh..am I correct?) Nano wanted to do some shopping as Ikea is having it's moving sale. But alas, nearly everything were wiped out and it's only the 2nd day of sale. Dah jadi macam pejabat Ahmad Nisfu in 3 Abdul movie...hee, sapu bersih. After that, went for dinner + looking for tulang at pasar malam (no tulang can be seen too!)

Managed to catch Charlie's Angel: Full Throttle and Terminator 3: Rise of The Machines. Charlie's Angel, is good plain fun. Nothing much for the storyline but the action-packed sequence was great. Just get your heart pumping with each action. And I love Cameron Diaz too. She just so cute, clumsy and funny! As for T3, well..what can I say when Arnold is acting as the Terminator. He make one good Terminator. But this time, it's "She'll be back.." Go and watch these two movies, highly recommended. :)

What else..ermm, I've survived half of Monday. So another half to go, yihaa!

Gotta go now. Have to complete some returns before the deadline tomorrow, ciao!

Dear, that little act of yours really touched me..*S*

[Back-post edition 5 - Back!]

6th Jul 2003

1722 hrs



Are You Naughty or Nice?

Which [5 Elements] are you?

Is the glass half full or half empty?

I'm back. But will be back later to update, till then!

bahh! Hate this post-holidays blues..missing him so bad already!

0029 hrs

[Till we meet again]


Done my packing.

Nothing to much be said actually. Gotta get my rest for tomorrow. Will be catching the 9am coach tomorrow for my "terkezut" holiday..ehe..

So till we meet again, ciao!

Note: No update till Monday ok! :)

[Money-Searching, Soul-Searching]

Was written @1015hrs

Yeah, yesterday is a money-searching day..hee, sounds terrible eh? But that's what happened..ermm, I shouldn't elaborate here but I was really caught left, right, front and back. No way out and at my wit's end. Luckily, there's my beloved mother to rescue me (after the lengthy nagging, eheh!). Thanks, mom!

Thought the money-searching had indeed ended. But after my Maghrib prayer, was resting when I saw my rack of CDs under the PC- workstation covered in dust and the idea just struck me there and then. Going thru the stacks of Westlife, N Sync, Savage Garden, The Corrs, Ricky Martin and endless list of unlistened CDs, I arranged and packed them off. Where to? Where else but the Cash Converters shop to make some money. heh!

Make a quick call to my mom to arrange to meet somewhere and I headed for the shop. And guess how much I earned? Nearly $50 for those 23 CDs, not bad eh? I wasn't expecting much especially after watching the lady before me selling CDs too and managed to sell them off only at $0.50 per piece. I was quite disappointed and started to figure out at what price will my CDs sell. Later I found out the CDs the lady was selling are not original ones and had to be sold at lower prices. Fuhh, lucky mine were ori eh? So there I was walking out of the shop $50-richer. hee..

Rush off to meet my parents for dinner...ermm, a very rare occassion. But quite touching indeed. Well, I know it's just a dinner at KFC. As my relationship had never been better with my parents. We were not close before and have even been on not-talking terms. But it got better lately. I know I've been quite bitter as a daughter. Keras kepala! Tak pernah dengar cakap my parents. I'm always in the right. And I also felt that my parents aren't treating me fair as a daughter. They have always been on my brothers side. I'm been denied a lot of attention. And that really made me despise them. But as time goes by, I realised that love and attention is something that I couldn't demand. It comes naturally. So if my parents love my brothers more than me, so let it be. I learnt to accept the fact.

But since, my brothers got married (especially my 2nd bro, Abang Izal), they got closer to me. Well, I'm the only left there..hee..We can now eat and talk together. And this has been such a relief to me. No matter how far you go and where you are, you still got your family to turn to right? I also had this feeling that when I've things on my mind, I just want to be close with my mom. Even though, I sometimes don't share my problems with her but knowing she's always near is indeed a warm feeling.

~Just a day more till my "terkezut" holiday! *S*

[Back-post edition 4 - Menadah Gerimis]

29th June 2003

1924 hrs

Song that best conveys my feelings at the moment..ermm..

Menadah Gerimis

Bagaikan terdengarnya suara

Menghakis mengikis naluri

Mengeruhkan jernih suasana

Dan merentap harapan

Tiada erti aku merindu

Jika kau tak ingin bertemu

Apa gunanya bercinta di dalam kepura-puraan

Yang lafaz cinta hanya bibir

Namun diri tak seringnya hadir

Di saat engkau diperlukan... Aku hampa

Usah dikelirukan cinta

Yang terkusut jiwa merana

Jangan dengan separuh hati

Diri ini kau cintai

Usahlah renung hanya di mata

Benamkanlah ke dasar hati

Renunganmu telusnya pasti

Berarasy ke syurga cinta

Menanti kunjungan hampir pasti

Mengharap titis embun pagi

Dan bagai menadah gerimis

Yang masih pulang pergi

[Sunday morning quiz]

29th Jun 2003

1127 hrs


You are a David Weinberger.

You are smart, savvy, interested in why people do what they do,
enjoy questioning yourself and are not balding.
Take the What Blogging Archetype Are You test at GAZM.org

Came across it here!

[When the tv box when on strike...]

28th Jun 2003

2236 hrs

Tonight, my house seems so peaceful. All because the tv box called for a strike earlier this afternoon. It went all quiet and no pictures can be seen except for greyish flakes. My grandma was all worried. The tv is her idea of entertainment, to pass her time. With all those dramas, sitcom and especially those morning shows on TV3 (erkss, forgotten what's the show title. Enlighten me, anyone?) So when the tv broke down this afternoon, she was pestering me to do something about it. So I checked the wires and connection. Apparently the fault did not lie with my tv set. It's the antenna connection in the building. Nothing can be done except to wait and see.

And all this resulted in a quiet evening for my family. But it has its good. As there's no entertainment at home, I decide to drag my mom along with me to the bazaar just across the road. And after that, while waiting for isya, I sit down and chatted with my grandparents (which I haven't done for quite some time. Blame it on the very limited time that I had with working and etc..etc..). We chatted for quite a while. After isya prayers, my grandma stayed in the room and chatted with me. And when my parents came back, they joined us too.

So kind of quality time spend eh?

Anyway, last evening the activity that my colleagues and I had been planning for the past weeks took place. Should say it went ok except that our bosses do not arrive in time to pay our entrance fees to the Asian Civilisation Museums. So we end up waiting there till 3 in the afternoon. But the hi-tea was ok. The pastries served were nice and the free-flow which came at a price in the first place was given to us free. So it's really a free flow hee..

I will be out of the country next week. A terkezut planned-holiday. Actually I'm supposed to leave today, but too kelam kabut for me with my bag not packed and tix not bought. So after some re-planning, it set to be mid-week. Yihaa! Holiday again..*S*

[Back-post edition 3 - Quarter Life Crisis]

26th Jun 2003

2335 hrs


Since my day at the office today is just a normal day, I've decided to post this article which was forwarded to my office mailbox early this afternoon.

THEY call it the "Quarter-life Crisis". It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like.

You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two,but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.

What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but they are as confused as you.

You look at your job? And it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinion have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.

You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is noting to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better.

Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know you aren't a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself?

And while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it.

We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy.

So, any of you guys suffering from that? ermm..i do have some of the symptoms..shucks!! But hey..! I'm not suffering from any crisis..!

Tomorrow, my department is going on an outing. (yipee!!) So it'll be only a half day work us. Right after lunch, all the staff will be out including me. We'll be visiting the Asian Civilisations Museums and after that to the Merchant Court Hotel for some hi-tea. Great eh..? But at 9am, I'll have a meeting to attend to. And I'm not asleep yet?! Gulp!! Well, I intended to sleep early but will have to wait for him. Needs to discuss some things with me.

Ciao!

Back-post edition 2 - Cinta dan Rindu

26th Jun 2003

1026 hrs

Memendam rasa cinta dan rindu yang tak terluah sungguh menyeksakan...

[Back-post edition 1 - Which Cartoon Character Are You?]

25th Jun 2003

1300 hrs

Ever wonder which cartoon character you are most like? Well, a team of

researchers got together and analyzed the personalities of cartoon

characters. The gathered information has been incorporated into this quiz.

Answer each question with the choice that most describes you at this point

in your life, then add up the points that correspond with answers.

1) Which describes your perfect date?

a) Candlelight dinner for two

b) Amusement Park

c) Roller blading in the park

d) Rock Concert

e) See a movie

2) What is your favorite type of music?

a) Rock and Roll

b) Alternative

c) Soft Rock

d) Classical

e) Popular

3) What is your favorite type of movie?

a) Comedy

b) Horror

c) Musical

d) Romance

e) Documentary

4) Which of the following jobs would you choose if you ere given only

these Choices?

a) Waiter/Waitress

b) Sports Player

c) Teacher

d) Policeman

e) Bartender

5) Which would you rather do if you had an hour to waste?

a) Work out

b) Read

c) Watch TV

d) Listen to the radio

e) Sleep

6) Of the following colors, which do you like the best?

a) Yellow

b) White

c) Sky blue

d) Teal

e) Red

7) Which one of the following would you! like to eat right now?

a) Ice cream

b) Pizza

c) Sushi

d) Pasta

e) Salad

8) Which is your favorite holiday?

a) Halloween

b) Christmas

c) New Year's

d) Valentine's Day

e) Thanksgiving

9) If you could go to any of the following places, which ould it be?

a) Paris

b) Spain

c) Las Vegas

d) Hawaii

e) Hollywood

10) Of the following, who would you rather spend time with?

a) Someone who is smart

b) Someone with good looks

c) Someone who is a party animal

d) Someone who has fun all the time

e) Someone who is very emotional

Now total up your points and find your character below:

1. a-4 b-2 c-5 d-1 e-3

2. a-2 b-1 c-4 d-5 e-3

3. a-2 b-1 c-3 d-4 e-5

4. a-4 b-5 c-3 d-2 e-1

5. a-5 b-4 c-2 d-1 e-3

6. a-1 b-5 c-3 d-2 e-4

7. a-3 b-2 c-1 d-4 e-5

8. a-1 b-3 c-2 d-4 e-5

9. a-4 b-5 c-1 d-4 e-3

10. a-5 b-2 c-1 d-3 e-4

(10-17 points) You are TAZ:

You are wild and crazy and you know it. You know how to have Fun, but you may take it to extremes. You know what you are doing though, and are much in control of your own life. People don't always see things your way, but that doesn't mean that you should do away with your beliefs. Try to remember that your wild spirit can lead to hurting yourself and others.

(18-26 points) You are Bugs Bunny:You are fun, friendly, and popular. You are a real crowd pleaser. You have probably been out on the town your share of times, yet you come home with the values that your mother taught you. Marriage and children are important to you, but only after you have fun. Don't let the people you please influence you to stray.Don't let your passion for romance get confused with the real thing.You are a best friend that no one takes the chance of losing. You never hurt feelings. You are serious about all commitments

(27-34 points) You are Tweety:You are cute, and everyone loves you. You are a best friend that no one takes the chance of losing. You never hurt feelings and seldom have your own feelings hurt. Life is a breeze. You are witty, and calm most of the time.Just keep clear of back stabbers, and you are worry-free.

*heh! Me a Tweety! Had always like Tweety, hee..*

(35-42 points) You are Peppe Le Pew: (without the smell)You are a lover. Romance, flowers, and wine are all you need to enjoy yourself. You are serious about all commitments. A family person. You call your Mom every Sunday, and never forget a Birthday. Don't let your passion for romance get confused with the real thing.

(43-50 points) You are Speedy Gonzales: You are smart, a real thinker. Every situation is approached with a plan.You are very healthy in mind and body. You teach strong family Values.Keep your feet planted in them, but don't overlook a bad situation when it does happen.

1252 hrs


Trying to look unhurt when you are is really a hard job,

Trying to smile when your heart is breaking is as hard too,

Trying to laugh when you're sad is neither too easy,

But that is what I'm doing. Looking unhurt,smiling and laughing when my heart is hurting, breaking and crying..

So who say life is easy?

Hurt.

But..ermm, nevermind.

2304 hrs

Well, well..it's Tuesday now. And tomorrow will be Wednesday eh? So half of the battle won? haha..that's my usual thought. Once it's Wednesday, weekend is not too far away. But don't you think time now doesn't fly but it zoom off like a rocket. Before you know it, Ramadhan is going to be here..bringing Syawal with it...erkss, it's scary. Now, stop that thought at once!

Now, what was in mind just now? oohh, was on my way back from the office just now when I saw a group of young girls playing hide and seek at the void deck. And all of sudden, it striked me. How carefree their lives are. No worries, no bills to pay for, no office to go to. Just play, play and play. How I really miss my childhood. Not to say that I've the greatest time when I was a child (I grow up with 2 big bullies of all time..haha) but minus all the worries and problems life is giving me now, I'll give anything to have my childhood back. But come to think of it, you can't do much thing when you are young right? No shopping, no money of your own to spent, no going on holidays on my own..eheh. So be it in my childhood time or now, we got to be grateful for what we had. Kalau kita susah, ada yang lebih susah dari kita, betul tak? But how weird it is don't you think so..when you were young, you really want to grow up, working (don't tell me you never once pretend you were working in an office, with files in your hands..I'm guilty of that..*blush*) But now I really wish I'm still in school. Study is all the work need to be done. The rest shall be taken care of the parents. But life as a student is not too easy nowadays too, right? So what should it be?

ermm..can I move on..hee..This is totally a different subject I'm breaching on. Well, TV::ISM made it's debut on tv tonite. It's a show which talks about music. But in a different aspects where they don't just potray an artist but what goes behind it. Their thinking, work and aspiration. And all other factors which influenced the music industries. Even though this show is potrayed in a serious format but with it's 3 interesting host: Najip - Spore, Sarah Sechan - Indonesia and Afdlin Shauki(my favorite!) - Msia, makes the show all more interesting. I never really sit down and watch musical show but this one sure will get me hooked.

Lately I also heard about Akademi Fantasia, which was shown in Astro channel? (correct me if I'm wrong here). This show is very similar to American Idol. Not sure if it's shown in Msia. But it's shown here and the rating is quite high for every show. It's a programme which potrays new talents. They will performed and be judged. And at the end of it all, the one with the least votes will be kicked out. But the judges in American Idol can be really hard on you. They can bring you down so hard that it really hurt. But think it's different with Akademi Fantasia...ermm, can't comment much on it cause the show is not shown here.

opss, me babble too much eh? ermm..hee..just getting it out of the system.